Source: pixabay.com
My Featured Blogger this week is poet, essayist and nature photographer, Mike Utley of Silent Pariah. Mike, who lost his hearing in his late teens, created his blog site, he says, “to finally come to terms with my deafness and put to rest my Sisyphean struggle against it. It’s a battle I can’t win and which I’ve fought fruitlessly for decades. Also, I hope to find others who may feel hopeless as they endure life in quiet isolation. After all, no one deserves to be a silent pariah.” No one indeed. Mike speaks to the silent pariah in us all. Visit Mike’s site to read more!
a handful of stones
the currency of a hardened heart
cannot purchase a reprieve
from the weight of mountains
upon my soul
scree of memories
who can navigate the slope
of ankle-breaking regrets
the sharpened shale
of the empty slate
where hope
was once etched
and now only
dust remains
we walked that path
through the foothills of yesterday
where everything was evergreen
the eternal evening
redolent of lilac and honeysuckle
and wild rose
and the wan moon
dozed in the lavender sky
and you were there
but you weren’t there
your body in a mountain meadow
and your mind in
a roiling pit of despair
I held your hand
more tightly than I should have
I couldn’t let go
not then
(not now)
but you didn’t seem to mind
your trembling fingers
nested in my palm
like a dying sparrow
losing heat
as you lost opacity
I could see you fading
we walked that path
where the trees thicken
and congregate
and whisper furtively
and the air hangs in tatters
from gnarled, pensive boughs
and you closed your eyes
and hummed an atonal tune
more of a whimper than a song
and I tried to accompany you
but my voice was gone
stone-silent
lungs airless
mind blank
and your strange aria
stirred the moon-dappled patches
on the path
into a kaleidoscope of sorrow
and a smile touched your pale lips
as my heart broke
I held your hand
until it was nothing
but a memory
the sky above
now an empty void
your skin iridescing
in the gloaming
as though tinctured
with fallen stars
and glowing novae
evanescing
your essence diminishing
we walked that path
until I walked alone
your silent song
forever in my mind
an echo among
cold indifferent granite peaks
the sound of emptiness
of a heart in pieces
of a life bereft of solace
a handful of stones
to remind me
that you existed
long ago
and far away
should you ever
pass this way again
look for the cairn
along the path
there you’ll find
what’s left
of my heart
To visit Mike’s blog site, click here.
Thank you, Mitch, for your kindness in featuring me on your blog. It’s an honor that means a lot to me (and it really made my morning, too!). Much gratitude to you, my friend, for such a nice gesture. 🙂 *tips cap*
The honor is mine, Mike, truly. (*tips cap back*)
Pingback: Featured Blogger of the Week at Mitch Teemley’s “The Power of Story” Blog – Silent Pariah
What a moving poem. Thanks Mitch for sharing, headed to his blog now. 🙂
Amazing! This is so well deserved ~ Mike is wonderful!
Thank you,
David
Many thanks, David. Your kindness knows no bounds. Truly grateful, good sir! 🙂
I agree, David!
Very well done! One can feel the emotions while reading. Glad I found your blog.
Thanks so much for the kind words, Joy. Glad you enjoyed this poem. 🙂
A Cairn….terrier but a Cairn nonetheless!
Joseph Yakovetic 4480 Powderhorn Place Drive Clermont, Florida 34711
mobile: 909.241.6088
SDG Soli Deo Gloria “To God Alone the Glory”
Mike, this is terrific. 🌹
Kindest thanks, my friend! Much appreciated. 🙂
Magnificent, the color of heartbreak…
Thanks so much–that’s very kind of you. Much appreciated. 🙂
Great share! Mike is so talented.
Many thanks, Michele. I’m happy to know you enjoyed this poem, my friend. 🙂
Wow! That’s pretty awesome, Mike. Also, calling your struggle Sisyphean has finally given me a metaphor for the battle I waged against Tourette Syndrome for so many years. I knew I wasted my time but I couldn’t stop… until I did.
Thanks for the kind words, Jeff. Yeah, some battles are impossible to win, and sometimes we get caught up in some strange notion of martyrdom, thinking it’s a noble cause to throw ourselves on our swords or something. I like how you put it: “I knew I wasted my time but I couldn’t stop…until I did.” That’s pretty profound. 🙂
Thank you for this struggle so carefully shared in meaningful , helpful words. Those who are on the outside of such deep personal awareness often feel in pain too. Beautiful poem.
Thanks so much for your kind and thoughtful words. Pain is indeed universal, but knowing we’re not alone in our suffering can help us along our own personal journeys. 🙂
Such a deep and profound sorrow. Life can be so filled with pain and desperation. Yet still, even the shattered pieces mean something to us.
Many thanks for your insightful comment. Picking up the pieces can be so difficult, but, as you said, those pieces can have profound meaning, and the memories can be a healing balm as time goes on. Much appreciated. 🙂
Beautiful! Poignant and arresting imagery. Thank you for introducing us – yet again – to someone who is such an artist with the written word. Checking out his other work now.
Thanks for the kind words, Russell. Glad to know you enjoyed this poem. Much appreciated. 🙂
Thanks for sharing! Mike is a wonderful poet!
Thanks a bunch, Lauren. Glad you enjoyed this one. 🙂
You’re very welcome, Mike!
I’m so delighted to see Mitch featured here with his unbelievable poem that Mike is know for. His words always have so much depth, honesty and heart. A gift to all who read him💞🙏🏼💞
Thank you kindly, Cindy. Your kindness and support mean so much to me. Much appreciated. 🙂
You’re so very welcome Mike!!! It’s my gift!!!
💕
A beautiful share, Mitch. I love Mike’s poetry and how deeply moving it always is.
Thanks so much as always, Diana. I’m so pleased to know you enjoyed this poem. Deeply grateful to you, my friend. 🙂
Marking the trail of life.