My Real Memoir
A year after I first met icon-in-the-making Keith Green, he released a song about religious complacency. Interestingly, its title “Asleep in the Light” was the mirror opposite of a phrase I’d used to describe my own spiritual journey.
It was Sunday, the day after I publicly acknowledged my neonatal faith. On impulse, I called my comrade-in-arms Mark to see what he was up to. “Well, I’m meeting some, um, church friends for lunch,” he said, “I mean, you can join us, but—”
“Sure, I’ll see you there.”
Following his own previous conversion, Mark had frequently introduced the J-word (Jesus). In response to which I’d always fire erudite “how-do-you-explain-this?” questions he didn’t have the answers to. So he’d learned to steer clear of the topic.
But what Mark didn’t realize was that I was genuinely searching—just not in ways he would recognize. Like contemplating Jesus’ words in a book called Autobiography of a Yogi. Then setting up a Buddhist meditation scroll in the corner of my bedroom. And then replacing it with a Bible. And finally, following my own circuitous path to my heart’s true home.
I arrived at the café, and Mark introduced me to his friends. Almost immediately, the guy across from me asked, “So, how long have you been a believer, Mitch?” Mark cringed. “Oh, no, Tim, Mitch isn’t a—”
“About two months,” I replied.
I can still see the fork falling out of Mark’s hand. He’d long ago stopped trying to tell me about Jesus (but never stopped praying for me). He shouted, “Now I know there’s a God! You’re the last person on earth I thought would… How?”
I told them about my clandestine journey. “I was miles away, but I kept knocking on doors,” I concluded. “So, in a way, I was closer than the guy who’s at the right house, but asleep on the porch. I was in the dark. But I was awake.”
At our university the next day, fellow-newbie convert Paul spotted me. He grinned and, as if we’d committed a crime, whispered, “People know.”
Sure enough, halfway through Graduate Acting, one of my classmates blurted, “So, Mitch, I hear you’re not a free-thinker anymore.” I thought back on how I’d previously grilled poor Mark. And how ex-atheist C.S. Lewis had reacted when his fellow Oxford dons grilled him. “Honestly,” I answered, “this is the hardest and freest thinking I’ve ever done.” Our master teacher and department chair Bob Cohen frowned. He told me to meet with him after class.
Annoyed, Bob asked me why, in my final term, I wasn’t doing a play. “Because my work here has gotten me my first college directing job!” I told him. He nodded inscrutably, and then suddenly switched gears. “So, you’re one of those born-agains, eh?” I assumed he was disappointed in me.
But I learned the real reason ten years later at an alumni reunion. Bob introduced me to his scholarly wife Lorna, who, he informed me, was also “a born-again.” She smiled, took me aside, and told me she was writing a book entitled Letters to My Atheist Husband.
Last year, Bob passed away. And in his obituary, Lorna, his wife of five decades, concluded her tribute with a paragraph about Bob’s final years. The master teacher, it seemed, had finally met the Master Teacher. As an ardent church member, Bob relished passing out Sunday bulletins with a cheery, “Enjoy the show!” Apparently, he too had been…
Awake in the dark.
My Real Memoir is a series. To read the next one, click here.
This telling is so engaging. The mentions of Keith Green and C. S. Lewis draw. More so does the story of the reactions to your faith and of the couple that had been together for decades and in the faith. I do believe, and I find what you relate here encouraging. Thanks, Mitch!
Thanks You is a beautiful history. God bless you brother.
My privilege, Christopher, and thank you for your reflection.
Hear the word of the LORD, O all of you nations, and declare it in the isles far off, and say, He that scattered Israel will gather him, and keep him, as a shepherd does his flock.
Jeremiah 31:10
jeremiah 56:35 when i am afraid thou shall trust in thee
((Chills)) Oh, this is awesome and glorious … a freethinker of divineness! Sorry to hear about your friend, Mitch … who is now “Enjoying the Show” alive in light! Heavenly story!
Thank you, Siri.
Great post, thanks for sharing
Thank you for the inspiring post!
My privilege, my friend.
WOW!!! This is wonderful! Brought tears – happy tears – to my eyes 🙂
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awe great post mitch..
Why, thank you, William.
pleasure.
I love happy endings! Thanks, Mitch. 🙂
Truly my pleasure, Nancy.
I don’t think I will remotely grasp the depths of God’s wonderful, powerful grace until I enter into eternity and see, with mine own eyes, people who I didn’t expect to be there. And they will undoubtedly be just as astonished to see me there, too.
;>) Very true, my friend, very true.
Greg Laurie as the youth pastor? I hear him on “A New Beginning” sometimes. What a remarkable story 😎🙏
Yep, he started out doing the message for Calvary Chapel’s Saturday night concerts, and eventually pastored his own church, Harvest, which in turn led to the Harvest Crusades.
A great story about a great storyteller! Thanks for sharing, Mitch.
Aw, bless you, dear Peggy.
Each of this memoir-episodes that feature your journey from atheist to Jesus-follower gives me more hope for the non-believers we pray for among family and friends. Thank you Mitch!
My privilege, dear Nancy!
I love Mark’s reaction!!! If we’re lucky we will be able to say those same words when someone we love comes to salvation after years of faithful, praying for them
Congratulations on your Light. I’m so happy for you!
Thank you, MaryAnne.
WOW, people have such amazing journeys! And you met Keith Green–double WOW WOW.
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What a grest story, Mitch. I’m thinking you’ve given some people hope today. 🥹
I hope and pray so, Annie.
Mitch, your stories are so good!! And how cool! Keith Green was one of our family favorites growing up, along with Rich Mullins. I’m still praying for one of my own awake in the dark friends. Your story gives me hope!
I’m so happy to hear that, Yael.
We’re always excited to hear when someone we’ve talked to, shared the gospel with, come to the light and life in Christ.
We will know how many, on the other side of eternity.
Blessings Mitch
And blessings upon you, Pete.
Hearing about people finding their faith is something I’ll never stop being in awe of. There’s this feeling of lightness, hope and gratitude that a life has not perished. Although I feel I’m sleeping in the light or awake in the dark more often, and I question whether I’ll perish. I love these Mitch. I’m going to borrow them.
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Wow, yes! “Awake in the dark” describes perfectly my long journey too. Thank you, Mitch!
My privilege, Sheila.
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Thank you Mitch. I always love hearing how people found faith. I only found mine after I lost it. Having grown up in a good Christian (albeit fundamentalist) home I had to unlearn everything before I could find the Father and the Son….
Many people follow a roundabout path like that, Gregory. My wife’s story is similar to yours.