Tips for Writers
Martin Luther famously said, “Sin boldly, but believe more boldly still!” In other words, if you’re going to do something, don’t do it by halves!
While editing my novel, I became aware that I’d overused the phrase “as if” and it’s near-twin “as though.” Sure enough, when I hit the Find command, I discovered I’d used them a combined 119 times! I was determined to eliminate the majority of instances, and succeeded in reducing them to a modest 21 (not too bad for an 80,000 word book). But it led me to discover something even more important:
I was a literary wuss!
You see, I was afraid to be caught exaggerating or—heaven forbid—outright lying! After all, as ifs indicate situations that are uncertain, conditional, or untrue, so grammatically speaking they’re correct. But literarily speaking, they’re wussy.
More often than not, as if clauses lack boldness. They’re like the guy who carries a lot of insurance and never takes any risks (“Paintball can lead to eye injuries!”). Prudent, maybe. Exciting? No.
The solution is to sin boldly! Exaggerate. Or even downright lie! Unless you’re a journalist or (ahem) politician. And anyway, if you’re a creative writer it’s not really lying, it’s hyperbole. Hyperbole, when it’s executed correctly, isn’t about how things are, it’s about how they seem to be, how they feel.
“It was as if the whole city was crashing down on top of her,” is OK. But “The whole city was crashing down on top of her!” is bolder and more immediate. It emphasizes how she feels right now.
“It seemed as though he’d been here before” is a straightforward déjà vu statement. It’s also lazy (I often catch myself lazy-writing). Remember Storytelling 101: “Show, don’t tell.” “The cracked stucco and sagging half-timbers exposed something decaying in the back of his mind” reveals more than the fact that he might have been here before; it reveals a character trait (emotional repression), and hints at a provocative backstory.
In a broader sense, we’re talking about similes vs. metaphors. And dramatically speaking, metaphors are almost always stronger than similes. “She felt like a broken doll” is OK, but “She was a broken doll” is bolder, more visual, more poignant. So sin boldly, and your readers will…
“Believe more boldly still!”
I just wanted to say that Martin Luther quote callback at the end was perfectly executed!
Thanks, Abe!
Great guidance, Mitch. Succinct sentences are powerful.
Thanks, Mark.
Great advice. I tend to qualify my statements too much because I don’t want to sound like an arrogant blowhard. I should embrace both my arrogance and blowhardness.
“Blowhardness”? LOL 😀
;>)
Similes, metaphors, and hyperbole are fun to fiddle with-but you’re right-be bolder! 🙂
Interesting point, Mitch! I don’t know how often I say “as if,” but my wussiness comes out in the phrase, “It seems.”
So, It seems as if I’ve been doing the same thing. (*eye roll*)
P.S. So it’s OK to say, “That wasn’t a lie, it was hyperbole!” ?
It seems as if it is, Annie. ;>)
“It seems” was my downfall, too. I had to work hard to eliminate the biggest portion of them. It does push your creativity to find alternative ways to say things so that they don’t become repetitive in themselves.
I’ve never given this much thought. Now, I need to see if I’m a wussy writer too. Thanks for the seeds.
My pleasure, Terry.
That’s a good point, Mitch. However, it leaves me feeling torn between the two decisions.
As a tech translator and reviewer, I totally agree with you about cutting all the repetitions; while as a writer and reader who dies for bold styles, I love the idea of sinning boldly.
So, I can’t pick one side at all. 😂
Btw, I loved the pic.
;>)
Great reminders Mitch. Thanks for the tips.
Perhaps is a word I use too much. There is no maybe for the bravest story tellers. Great post, Mitch. Thank you for sharing what you’ve learned with us.
Bravo! I needed this encouragement today, and I’ll need it again tomorrow and next week. I’m also in the edit mode, albeit a paused edit mode until I sit myself in the chair and boldly proceed.
Happy to have provided a bit of encouragement, Bonnie. Go boldly!
Mitch, it is wonderful to see how your editing is progressing with your book. Wow, I cannot imagine writing 80,000 words so I congratulate you for your journey. Thank you for sharing these thoughts of encouragement for the rest of us writers.
My privilege, Pete.
I like your reasoning concerning style and how you qualify with “almost always” that metaphors are stronger than similes. I like to remember also Dr. Johnson’s cranky opinion that using metaphor was slightly indecorous. In his dictionary he defined it as “The application of a word to a use which in its original import it cannot be put.”
And Dr. J annotated the works of Shakespeare–the godfather of metaphorists!
Good point! 🙂
Thanks, Jim!
AMEN, Mitch! It is as if you are reading my mind! Oops! I mean, you ARE reading my mind. My lazy writing traps are the words “just” and “actually.” I can eliminate every instance of those two words in a piece and lose nothing. Thanks for your encouragement!
Delighted to have encouraged you, my Anonymous friend.
Pingback: True Love Exaggerates — Always!!!! - Mitch Teemley
Great post. Yes, literary wussiness. I even see it in my own letters when I’m trying to skirt around an issue and not just be forthright.🙄