My Real Memoir
My anxiety was still on the hunt. It whispered from under the bed and grinned at me from darkened hallways. But I drowned it with hope, and crowded its specter with friends, new comrades in faith.
My previous pseudo-lover Jelli now prayed with me every day. Even after graduating, she kept in touch, calling excitedly when she landed her first TV role on Mork and Mindy. And new friend Jeff Walling confessed his own doubts en route to a deeper faith, strengthening my own. He would later become a nationally-known inspirational speaker.
Most of the actors I knew were already in plays. But one, Cecily Adams, auditioned for my production of Godspell. And she and my Swiss Army knife assistant, Star, joined me in prayer before every rehearsal. Both had huge hearts and huge talent. Cecily, the daughter of TV star Don Adams (Get Smart), eventually carved out her own much-loved Hollywood legacy.
Finally, Jeremy Dalton, our play’s beguiling John the Baptist, and I swapped God-stories and groaners at a café after every rehearsal. We laughed till we cried. He too became a well-known performer, and a Grammy-nominated composer.
I was director of the Newport Beach Art Festival as well as our musical. And so, radioactive with creative energy, and then too weary to worry, I’d fall happily into bed each night, while anxiety stood brooding in the corner.
Our Godspell was presented on an outdoor stage, surrounded by stores and trees, and we used it all. Before the show, our actors, disguised as audience members, started arguing about “religion,” nearly coming to blows. Real audience members tried to calm them, even yelling at them to stop.
Then, suddenly, a spotlit John the Baptist atop a three-story Macy’s roof began blowing a trumpet. The audience turned to watch as he climbed down a rope ladder, and walked to the stage, singing “Prepare Ye the Way of the Lord.” Our actors ran forward, then paused as Jesus appeared in the midst of the audience. There was a huge—and much-relieved—burst of applause as they realized all of this was planned.
But no moment affected them as deeply as when our actors piled up the props used throughout the play, and then climbed up onto them, becoming a living cross. They lifted Jesus and held him in place. And the audience began to sob as they grasped the meaning: we crucified him.
After carrying Jesus body away, the cast returned empty-armed, singing “Prepare Ye the Way of the Lord” in a moving, but uncertain moment. And then, as the audience prepared to leave, Jesus appeared once again, smiling from the rooftop where we’d first seen John the Baptist.
The Festival and Godspell were spectacular successes. I was high on praise. And three nights later I extended that high by attending the opening night of a movie I’d waited anxiously to see. But my pent-up anxiety was also anxious to attend.
Don’t get me wrong. I loved Star Wars (and still do). But halfway through, the thought struck me, What if I go crazy and run down in front of the audience and start screaming? The thought took root and multiplied, turning into a major panic attack. But then, realizing what I was missing, I told myself, If it happens, it happens. Either way, I’m going to watch this movie! And the anxiety timidly departed. It was my first glimpse of a method that would eventually…
Change my life.
My Real Memoir is a series. To read the next one, click here.
Great resume’. It’s great to revisit successes now and then. Thanks for Sharing. 🤣😎🙃
My pleasure, my Anonymous friend.
Love this! Your vision is quite clear. I wish I could have witnessed the production live!!
Why, thank you, Kiki!
Wow! So cool, Mitch. 🎉🎉🎉
Thanks, Iman.
What a great Godspell that would be!!! I too attended opening night of Star Wars with my future husband. It was the only movie we went to that was sold out.
Yep, and the rest is history!
Nice
Remember that Godspell with Victor Garber as Jesus? I once directed Victor in a high-school musical called “Where’s Charlie?” Their Godspell launched the careers of several Canadian actors.
I remember the movie version well, Gail, and have written about it several times. But, wow, how awesome that you directed Victor in a high school musical!! I know the Toronto stage production of Godspell was the launch pad for his long film and television career.
A beautiful testimony, Mitch. I have never seen Godspell, but your description of your play makes me want to see it that way. I was picturing it as I read. Thanks so much for sharing your heart.
My privilege, Diane. Godspell is a very popular play, so you’ll likely have a chance to see it at some point. Or you can watch the movie version on Amazon or Apple TV for a few dollars. It’s a little dated, but has an infectious spirit.
Wonderful story! You made me feel like I was right there with you. 🙂
I’m so pleased to hear that!
Panic attacks are very real, and very disturbing. “Fear of their faces” was my own problem for some years, but the Lord instantly delivered me from them one day. It was incredible to be truly free of that demonic fear, as I’m sure you can testify. Love your posts, Mitch. Blessings from Florence, SC. Bette
Bette, thank you so much for your kind words, and for sharing a little of your own experience with anxiety. And praise God for that healing.
Engaging and real. Love your stories.
Thank you so much, Cari.
Compliments to you for such a creative production of Godspell. I’d have loved to have seen your version of the musical. It was no coincidence your breakthrough to conquer your demons happened because you wanted to see “Star Wars.” It was your destiny. 🙂
;>)
This is lovely, Mitch. The performance sounds thrilling.
Thank you, Nora.
Amazing story, Mitch!
Why, thank you, Daisy.
Wow! I love the visual of that Godspell staging. What an expert that must have been. Well done, Mitch.
Thank you, my Anonymous friend.
How awesome! I’d love to see that someday although I think my trips to the big apple are over these days.
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I loved Godspell, but I really wish I had seen your version of it!
Aw, thanks, Ann.
“…And the audience began to sob as they grasped the meaning: we crucified him…”
Spectacular! What a creative way to express our responsibility. Amazing!
Why, thank you, Pete.
Cool, Mitch. Lots of amazing memories and experiences. Thanks for sharing!
My pleasure, Anne. And good to hear from you, as always!
Your description of your Godspell is captivating, brother. Thanks for sharing. I wish I could have seen it live.
Thanks, Marty. Maybe there are replays in heaven. ;>)
Wow! Amazing! What a glorious production! God bless you.
Thank you, Stephanie.
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