Thought for the Week
“Half of seeming clever is keeping your mouth shut at the right times.” ~Patrick Rothfuss
I tend to launch into stories at the slightest provocation, or even lack thereof. I once thought this was simply because I was an extrovert. And there’s truth in that. Maybe. According to experts, extroverts process their thoughts aloud, letting others in on everything they’re thinking.
A friend of mine was driving past a supermarket with his wife. “Oh!” she blurted. “I need spinach!” So he whipped into the parking lot. “Why did you do that?” she asked. “You said you needed spinach.” “Well, yeah, but I’m going to the market tomorrow.” He put the car in gear and started to leave. “Oh, wait!” she shouted. He screeched to a halt. “What?” “I can’t go tomorrow. Our advertising team is staying late to finish the quarterly report. I’ll go on Thursday.”
But some say extroverts are better defined by what energizes them: being in a group, rather than being alone. And on that basis, I’m an introvert. Because when I’m alone, writing, thinking and praying, is when I recharge. Interestingly, however, I still tend to process my thoughts out loud even then. In other words: I talk to myself.
That gave me an idea. Desirous of learning to listen more and talk less, I began experimenting with processing my thoughts in my head–while I’m alone. However, I quickly discovered my unvoiced thoughts were too vague. So I began putting them into mental words and sentences.
Research shows that people process information more clearly when they think in words. I once read about a study of a particular indigenous culture whose word for “humans” only applied to members of their tribe. As a result, they were unable to think of outsiders as human beings.
I’m still experimenting, but when I’m around others, I’m finding it a little easier to speak only my key questions or responses aloud. Result? I actually seem to be listening better. Plus, there’s a side benefit. When I do say something…
I sound a lot more clever.
Huh. I resonate with some of that. Thanks.
Interesting thoughts, indeed. 2025 we are still too deep into tribe thinking…..
An interesting post! I see introspection as a helpful way to understand ourself. The labels of introvert and extrovert seem a simplification for our complexities. I go within in silence and solitude for divine guidance and understanding but I also am quite open to sharing, expressing and interacting with people as well. Sometimes it is in balance, sometimes not. Mouth open or not, timing always seems key. I love silence and solitude to a degree. Not many people choose to observe their thoughts with questions as you are. I’m happy for you.
Thank you, and I agree.
I share your predilection for embarking on storytelling with the slightest provocation. And, exactly like you, Mitch, I used to think of that as a mark of being an extravert. “Listening better” is an art people like us really do need to work at…
It seems good communicators are often over-communicators, as well, Rob. ;>)
Thanks for sharing, I’m trying to become a better listener also.
I totally get this and tend to have the same habit.Many years ago, Glynis John had a summer replacement show where she was a mystery writer. One of the characters in this particular episode had complete conversations with herself. Hysterical but hen, SO REAL?
I process much sadness in my heart. Regret too. Or is it that it pocesses me ?
Likely both, my friend.
I know what I’m thinking, so I’m more interested in listening to others to know what they’re thinking. 🙂
A very healthy mindset, Nancy, but not all that common, I suspect.
I wrote it somewhere in something I needed someone to read. My self included. Stop, Look and Listen. There may be the Letter Q coming at you from an ongoing massiveness. (Da dit da da on the whistle for crossing with tthe ‘dit’ shorter in duration). Stop my thoughts becoming dominant, Look ohers in the eye, and listen to them.
You’ve slobbered a bib full here! Well said, and funny, too. Hits lots of my hot buttons. I think of myself as an ambivert, which is to be a walking civil war. 🙂
I know the feeling well, Jim.
I find it even better to actually voice them. I talk through things while I walk the dog. I’m sure the neighbors think I’m crazy.
Allen
There’s bad-crazy and good-crazy. You’re the good kind, Allen.
We tell stories because we get old and don’t want to be forgotten.
My doctor said it was okay to talk to myself and, in fact, that most people do that. And it’s even okay to ask themselves questions and answer them. But he wasn’t sure what to advise me when I told him, sometime I have to ask, “Huh, what’d you say?”🥴
;>)
Great post and lovely photo.
happy labor day
Thanks, Rudy!
your welcome
What an interesting, informative post! Thank you for sharing ❤️
My pleasure, Lisa.
That’s fantastic, Mitch! Your experiment is a great reminder that the most meaningful communication often starts with silence. You’re not just learning to listen to others, but also to yourself more deeply. I hope this journey continues to bring you “aha!” moments, where the words you choose don’t just sound clever, but also bring clarity—not only to others, but to your own heart as well.
Thank you, Livora. Are you Indonesian, btw? (Several of your comments were in Indonesian.)
Yes, I am Indonesian. You have a sharp eye! Sometimes I find that certain thoughts or emotions flow more naturally in my native language. But I also enjoy expressing myself in English—especially when the conversation touches on something as meaningful as this. Language, after all, is just a bridge; what matters most is the heart behind the words.
I couldn’t agree more, Livora.
When I sit in a lecture or a lesson, every time I feel like saying something I write it down, as if I’m taking notes. I got very good at this in college.
Smart approach, Kara!
Words. “Let there be light.” And there was.
On the other hand, when I talk to God aloud, sometimes I ‘hear’ His answers or comments coming out of my own mouth, too fresh and wise to be my own!
Blessings, brother Mitch.
I get that, and thanks, Anne. Blessing to you as well.
Love the opening quote–wisdom for me to follow.
So that’s why I appear, to some, as being quite, dare I say, intelligent. My ‘silence’ has been misdiagnosed… 😉 😉
;>) Oh, I doubt that, Carolyn.
The quote is wonderful. I think I’m learning to be clever.
;>)
Really enjoyed this reflection Sir🪷. Listening deeply is such an underrated skill, and your experiment shows how powerful it can be. Sometimes silence not only helps us understand others better, but also makes our own words carry more weight when we finally speak
Exactly, and thank you, Tushar.
Well shared. Interesting
Thank you, Priti.
I, too, process like an extrovert and recharge when I am alone (so I go on a week-long silent retreat every year to recharge). I think of myself as a highly socialized introvert.
Works for me.
I’ve been using what I call a Five Finger Mantra. Silence Is Power. Works like a charm.
👍
Great post 👏
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