When my daughter Amanda was 4 1/2, she drew the above illustration of American pioneer life. Her sister Beth, age 3, asked her why the pioneer girl was crying and why there were spiders in the covered wagon. Mandy patiently explained that the pioneer girl was crying because, “In those days all they had was spiders for pets.”
Where do kids get these things?
Here are a few other real children’s explanations:
Pregnancy: “That’s what happens when you share your toothbrush. I’m never sharing my toothbrush. Ever!”
Puberty: “During puberty a boy says goodbye to his childhood and enters adultery.”
The difference between Mommies and Daddies: “Mommies don’t have a penis, they have a brain.” ~Amber, 3
The Lord’s Prayer (as reported by their Sunday School teacher):
“Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name.” (Reece, 3)
“Forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets.” (Evan, 4)
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some email.” (Caitlin, 3)
The 9th Commandment: “Thou shall not take the covers off thy neighbor’s wife.” ~Susie
Biology
The End
As a child, I thought we were singing, “Bringing in the sheeps.” And I thought, “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so. He is strong but I am wee…”
I also thought it was “sheeps.” (I didn’t go to church, but I heard it sung in some pioneer movie.) And it’s true, you were wee. ;>)
Thanks for the smiles
❤❤❤
When innocence is still present, as are gems for adults to treasure 😊
We used to sing “while shepherds wash their socks by night”
Hilarious! I can’t wait until my son starts drawing pictures.
;>)
When our third child was born in December, our son noted that we were singing about her a lot in church. Thanks I guessed he meant because her name is Joy. He said no, recalling that there was a remnant of her cord still attached. He was talking about the hymn, with Joy full of cord.
!
Provided a great laugh in morning at work.
Thanks Mitch. 🙂
I really hope Warren didn’t get marked down. 🙂
No, but he definitely got a “glass is half full” vs. half empty talk.
Lol. Kids have such an incredible talent in humor. Lol. They outdo adults without even trying. Lol.
They do!
Yes Art, kids still say the darnedest things. Another great post Mitch!
Yep, I loved that show as a kid.
One of my kids talked about Pontious (her sp) the Pilot.
Haha, great! It proves kids are wise. And although only a few of us manage to keep this wisdom, we all agree about the difference between mommies and daddies 😂
Wait a minute… ;>)
This is hilarious. Loved the Lord’s Prayer. Thank you for the laugh!
Thank you for this! I laughed out loud quite a lot. It felt great. =) ♥.
right on!!!
big grin
Oh my!! Hilarious!!! Thanks for sharing! 🙂
Yep, laughed out loud Mitch!! Tooooo Funny!! Thanks for the joy!
Hilarious!
The Kids. They have always had the handle on Life.
John.
I didn’t know that about pioneers and spiders, but makes sense – after all a pioneer doesn’t have a lot of food, while spiders will eat the flies on the horses.
Good point, Andrew, and my daughter thought of this when she was 4 1/2. Why didn’t I?
You just need to start thinking like a child. 😉
Those are so funny!!! (Although I admit the difference between mommies and daddies and the last one really cracked me up.) Children do put their own spin on things. I remember that I used to think Heaven was God’s wife. When we prayed about God in Heaven, I heard “God and Heaven” and just assumed they were a couple.
Whoa, Holly Spirit’s going to be livid when she finds out about God’s other wife!
Ha! I’m thinking there might actually be a good sermon somewhere in this topic…..
I love this!
I think I will look the same 100 years from now. Kids, right?
Such fun kids are! 🙂
True this is, Yoda. ;>)
This is the best!
Indeed, kids are amazing. =)
These are hysterical! I love how kids see the world! Thanks for sharing!
Haha this is halarious!
http://Www.actilabmama.wordpress.com
Oh man kids just say the darndest things
Brilliant! Haha so funny!
I need to get better at writing down things my kids say!
I love this! I have a five year old daughter and a six year old son (they both just had birthdays) and they come up with some doozies. Not enough parents take the time to stop and listen to their children. We wave them off instead of paying attention but my child makes me laugh a hundred times a day, and laughter is the best medicine! MommyDaddyKids.com
It is indeed.