Fifty Shades of Me

Me at 20-something vs. Me at a smidge past 20-something (OK, so, maybe two or three smidges)

The grey started showing when I was in my late thirties, and advanced alarmingly quickly. Still, others noticed before I did.

I was the guest speaker at a youth camp. I called the camp when I arrived at the airport.

“What do you look like?” they asked.

“I have black hair.”

“Great, we’ll send someone!”

Hours passed. I called the camp five times. No one knew where the teenagers they’d sent to pick me up were (they didn’t have cell phones). Finally–four and a half hours later–two teenagers asked, “Are you Mitch Teemley?”

“Yes!” I shouted. I was not a happy (soon-to-be) camper.

“Well, it’s not our fault!” they complained. “You said you had black hair. It’s grey!”

“Well, it was black when I first got here!” I snapped back.

“Age doesn’t matter. Unless you are a cheese.” ~Billie Burke

“Middle age is when your classmates are so grey and wrinkled, they don’t recognize you.” ~Bennett Cerf

“There is only one cure for grey hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It’s called a guillotine.” ~P.G. Wodhouse

    “The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” ~Lucille Ball

“Wrinkles only show where smiles have been.” ~Mark Twain

“Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.” ~David Bowie

About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Humor, Memoir, Quips and Quotes and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

66 Responses to Fifty Shades of Me

  1. Andi says:

    I had to laugh when notification came in of your post and I saw the title. That’s so ME as a Gemini. You’d swear there were more than just two of us with all the internal battles as they never agree! I greyed early too. Just the front of my hair at first. I told everyone that part of my brain died. If I didn’t wear bangs I could have easily been mistaken as a 🦨. What a fun post. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. beth says:

    that’s hilarious. in the last year, I’ve let mine slowly turn to silver.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Love it! #aginggratefully

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Abe Austin says:

    “Well, it was black when I first got here!” 😀
    You’re a quick wit, Mitch! Maybe the hair color has changed but it seems the mind is still sharp as ever!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Well, I have to say the grey version of you is, mmmm, dignified, wise, stately, and dare I say more fitting for a film maker, writer, … and just all around renaissance man that you are …

    I’m 63 and still haven’t gone grey and still look like a pup, these days they ask for ID when I ask for the senior discount … the burdens in life … 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Victoria says:

    Love your quip….about how long you waited to be picked up…and the impact on your hair color! Hilarious…thank you, Mitch. I say you look the same…if we can keep the sparkle in our eyes, who cares about hair – or color! 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Good for you for leaving it alone. Once you start coloring, it’s hard to grow grey gradually. I was living in denial for decades, coloring my hair every few weeks. Then when I attended my 50th high school reunion and noticed I was the only one with brown hair, I went cold turkey and had most of the color removed in one day. My friends were shocked, and suddenly strangers were a lot more helpful. (Like that Boy Scout who tried to help me cross the street… :/ )

    Liked by 2 people

  8. I’m getting ready to hit the big 50 next month. A lot has changed in this bitter face since then. I have the same experience when I tell people I have hair, and they show up and say, ‘You’re bald!”

    Liked by 2 people

  9. You are one of the lucky ones. You look even better in the more recent photo.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. I started coloring my hair in my early forties because I had a new baby and it irritated me when people assumed she was my grandchild. But after a few years of expensive and toxic chemical camouflage, I began to notice how many women my age were letting their hair go gray, and how nice they looked. So I quit with the chemical stuff and let my hair revert to its natural state. (I’m a grandmother for real now, so it fits my image.)

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Handsome then and now! A lot of people do look great older and/or with gray hair. I don’t believe that youth instantly makes us attractive, it’s so much more than that and there is beauty in every stage of life 😊

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Handsome back then and still now too! I can see the peace of God in your eyes Mitch, God bless you and your wife.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Hahaha, I am also alarmed at the rate with which this gray nonsense has taken over my head… I just keep saying “at least it hasn’t fallen out!”, but I’m afraid that God – the greatest comedian – keeps hearing that and the other foot (follicle?) is about to drop…

    Liked by 1 person

  14. rwfrohlich says:

    I looked up the word “smidge” and…..

    Liked by 1 person

  15. My gray became white in the blink of an eye, Mitch. I didn’t even get the chance to try and “wash the gray out” as it didn’t stick around long enough. Congrats on the beard. I could have stopped shaving in my 20’s and I still wouldn’t have one lol.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Mitch, “Gray hair is a glorious crown; it is found in the ways of righteousness” (Proverbs 16:31, CSB).

    Liked by 1 person

  17. My hair is finally starting to get gray in an attempt to catch up with the “vintage” of my face.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Maryanne says:

    You are so funny!! And that’s a very nice photo of you. Very vibrant!

    I’ll be 60 in August and hardly have any gray. But I’m not dying my hair anymore because I want to embrace the gray when it does come. I’m pro-aging. I love my age. I agree with the Bowie quote 100 percent!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. My husband is SNOW WHITE as well and I think he looks very handsome. Me and my gray mess? Not so much, it has to go 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Years ago when my father-in-law (deceased) turned 80, we bought him a sweatshirt with a tree on it with the words “Eighty isn’t old if you’re a tree.” He loved it. His sense of humor kept him young at heart.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Janice Reid says:

    Handsome guy…love the gray hair.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. The Hinoeuma says:

    Handsome, with and without the gray. I have always had dark hair. I WISH my hair would gray, more than it has. I want lighter hair. It won’t cooperate.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Carolina Mom says:

    I love your hair! You look amazing! And I love the title. 🤣

    Liked by 1 person

  24. murisopsis says:

    You still have a great sense of humor – though I bet you have mellowed a bit! As a redhead I hoped I’d take after my mother who just got a little lighter until she was a dark strawberry color. Instead I take after her mother – and I still have red hair but with white “Bride of Frankenstein” stripes at my temples! At least my Halloween costume is easy enough to do…

    Liked by 1 person

  25. It must always be remember growing old is a luxury some people never get to experience. The most important thing is to stay fit and health and enjoy the time that is gifted to us.

    Liked by 2 people

  26. Karen :) says:

    I laughed aloud! Thank you. May we all age graciously and gratefully – and a little humor helps!

    Liked by 2 people

  27. Jeff Cann says:

    I went to meet an old coworker at a restaurant for lunch. I sat at the bar waiting and waiting for him to show up. I kept looking around, noting the ‘old gray-haired guy’ sitting at a table facing away. The old guy was looking for a friend too. He kept noticing the bald guy sitting at the bar. Sigh.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. Ann Coleman says:

    Aside from the hair color, you look the same! (And I want to know your secret for not aging….) But as someone who also went grey early, I loved your response!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  29. funny comeback to those teenagers! 🙂 enjoyed the story and the quotes. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Lovely piece . . . Made me laugh 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  31. The quote by David Bowie says it all!

    Liked by 1 person

  32. I love those first 4 quotes on aging you shared – very funny!

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Thanks for the good laugh!

    Liked by 1 person

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