Going Beyond Our Cubicles

Peering Over (betanews.com)
Image source: betanews.com

Our contempory culture is in the midst of a growing sociological divide. New walls go up every day, it seems, not so much between classes, as between values and belief systems. The best way to tear down walls, according to Mother Teresa, is to “start with the person nearest you.” And the best way to do that is to risk actually getting to know them.

Chris watches as 12:00 appear on his computer monitor. “Yes!” He jumps up, rips a microwave meal from his backpack, and reads the instructions aloud: “’Obsessive Compulsive Gourmet. Remove from box, poke holes at 1/4 inch intervals in counter-clockwise pattern. Microwave for 143 seconds, remove plastic, stir vigorously for 5.3 seconds, then replace plastic in exactly the same position it occupied before…’ “Jeez!” he shouts, then looks up. “Sorry, God. Does that count as cussing?”

Heather in the next cubicle snorts, “Um, no.”

“Hey, Heather,” Chris nods to the wall.

“Hey, Chris,” the wall replies. Heather’s head floats into view over the top. “Hey, is that Obsessive-Compulsive Gourmet? Those are great! I’ve got Grungy Man Beastloaf. Wanna swap?”

Chris takes the package from her and reads the directions: “’Heat until package disintegrates. Eat whatever remains.’ Cool. I’ll swap.”

Heather fishes, “So, Chris, it’s Friday and I’m having a few humans over for a, you know, little sock-hop. It’s pretty great. We get totally insane. You’ve never been over, so I thought you might wanna—”

Chris panics. Flashing back on his beer-pong days, he mutters, “Oh, uh, well, I mean, hmmm…” His eyes glaze over as he imagines Heather’s “little sock hop”: The golden calf orgy scene from C. B. DeMille’s The Ten Commandments. In Cinemascope.

“Chris? Chris?” Heather’s voice snaps him out of it.

“Oh, hey, that reminds me,” Chris replies, “We’re having Fellowship Night at my place on Wednesday. It’s a lot of fun. We study the Bible and, you know, get kind of crazy. Want to come?”

Heather panics. “Oh, uh, well, I mean, hmmm…” She envisions Chris’s “Fellowship Night”: the monks from Monty Python and the Holy Grail chanting while hitting themselves in the faces with boardsIn SpamScope.

“Heather? Heather?”

“Oh, hey, sorry, Chris,” Heather says to her skittishly hopeful fellow-cubicle-ee.

“So…?” they ask in nervous unison.

“Um, sure, I’ll come,” they reply in sync.

“You will?” they say in unison. “Great!”

They chuckle nervously. In unison.

“Holy crap…” Heather mutters to herself.

“Holy Spirit…” Chris mutters to himself.

“What have I gotten myself into?” they say…

In unison.


Cubicles” is available as a two-person scene from The Skit Guys. To read or download it, click here.

'Cubicles' (mitchteemley.com)

About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Culture, For Pastors and Teachers, Humor and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Going Beyond Our Cubicles

  1. While knowing our foibles,
    a quirky human himself,
    Mitch followed God’s call
    and we humans are enriched.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I can picture myself in one of those cubicles, having similar “inspirational” conversations. I count myself lucky cubicles are in my rear view mirror. My problem most often was I thought we were there to work, not socialize. Others had an opposite view.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. We can create our own cubicles without the sound deadening panels. The panels we were just getting used to with the 6-10 foot social deadening space. I notice cubicles in the local Mal-Wart store. They envelop anything pushed with wheels. A quick smile and if you feel led, do a quick scan on the name tag and say hello to them. It breaks the tension. Nice story by the way.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. revruss1220 says:

    What a great vignette! It reminds me that each of us has to risk a bit in order to see past the “cubicles” we build around ourselves. Thanks for reminding us of that truth in an easy-to-digest, entertaining way.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. The Skit Guys do a great job of revealing societal foibles and biblical truths.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. “Beastloaf” 😂😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Pingback: Going Beyond Our Cubicles | JESUS IS COMIMG BACK! Enjoy the Matthew Seufer Amazon Authors Page. Bringing Inspiration and Hope Worldwide in 2022.

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