Be afraid, be very afraid!
My Featured Blogger this week is K.J. Hanson of the somewhat unimaginatively named KJHansonStories.com. K.J.’s writing, on the other hand, is bursting with imagination and humor. I know literally nothing about the guy except that he must have difficulty swallowing since his tongue is perpetually in his cheek. In other words, K.J. is a very witty fellow. Visit him and you’ll see. And who knows, maybe he’ll even tell you what K.J. stands for.
Yes. Yes it is. Exercise is morally reprehensible. When you exercise, you consume a drastically increased amount of oxygen (the thing we all need) and expel tons of carbon dioxide (the bad stuff). Exercise contributes to global warming and is killing the planet (thanks fitness jerks). They’re basically poisoning the earth during their wind sprints and burpees (I hope that single-digit body fat percentage and rock-hard abs are worth it, you tool!).
Despite the above paragraph, I don’t think all people who exercise are bad, far from it. Well, not far from it. I actually pity them in a way, and not just for their assumed physical insecurities and probable lack of self worth. I pity them because one day they will understand how many lives they’ve ruined with their ignorance. I don’t envy anyone on that day.
Please keep an eye out for my next article: Why Writers are…
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