Be afraid, be very afraid!
My Featured Blogger this week is K.J. Hanson of the somewhat unimaginatively named KJHansonStories.com. K.J.’s writing, on the other hand, is bursting with imagination and humor. I know literally nothing about the guy except that he must have difficulty swallowing since his tongue is perpetually in his cheek. In other words, K.J. is a very witty fellow. Visit him and you’ll see. And who knows, maybe he’ll even tell you what K.J. stands for.
Yes. Yes it is. Exercise is morally reprehensible. When you exercise, you consume a drastically increased amount of oxygen (the thing we all need) and expel tons of carbon dioxide (the bad stuff). Exercise contributes to global warming and is killing the planet (thanks fitness jerks). They’re basically poisoning the earth during their wind sprints and burpees (I hope that single-digit body fat percentage and rock-hard abs are worth it, you tool!).
Despite the above paragraph, I don’t think all people who exercise are bad, far from it. Well, not far from it. I actually pity them in a way, and not just for their assumed physical insecurities and probable lack of self worth. I pity them because one day they will understand how many lives they’ve ruined with their ignorance. I don’t envy anyone on that day.
Please keep an eye out for my next article: Why Writers are…
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Mitch Teemley 
Funny…at least I hope. …and I’m not just opening mouth and inserting foot 😉
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witty but not my kind of humor – not everyone who works out does it for rock hard abs and zero body fat – some workout because we want to stay healthy and if we can’t bend we will break.
I am not into cardio junky workouts – but sedentary lifestyles and drooped heads are bad for the immune system.
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I agree, Prior, and I think K.J. would too. The piece is actually making fun of absurd logic (not exercise per se), such as the idea that exercise contributes to global warming. And it’s also a bit of a tease on the lengths people go to to excuse not doing something they know they should do.
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Hahaha
Thanks for the lesson and helping me to see! I think I only “get” certain types of humor – and so I think I get it now….
😆
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;>)
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Thanks for sharing! Have to show this to my husband before he exercises tonight. 😉 Witty humor I love and I am following him now. He writes stories, how can’t I follow. LOL!
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That’s a very thoughtful, intriguing and colourful post Lol. U wouldn’t say it
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meant *I wouldn’t say that not in these times we are living in
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Doing my part, wearing out my recliner. Why I hardly breathe at all. Funny post; underlying truth about extremes.
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PS, we need more humor like this; everyone is too dang serious these days. We need to have our follies exposed with a chuckle; that’s exactly what comedians used to do.
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Amen, Bob!
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I have a relative who goes by ‘K.J.’. I have it on good authority that the initials K.J. stand for Kill Joy.
You’re welcome 😀
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;>)
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Thanks for posting. Reading that was a real gas.
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Your correct Mitch, “K.J.’s writing is bursting with imagination and humor.” I laughed out loud in each story I read.
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Right on! Exercise sucks!
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Amen, sister.
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Hahaha… This is hilarious.
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