In the beginning… “The greater part of the world’s troubles are due to questions of grammar.” ~Michel de Montaigne
I object, a baby should never be subject to this! (Get it?)
“Never use abstract nouns when concrete ones will do. If you mean ‘More people died,’ don’t say, ‘Mortality rose.’” ~C.S. Lewis
Specificity really turns women on.
“This is the type of arrant pedantry up with which I will not put.” ~Winston S. Churchill
And speaking of prepositions:
Ancient hieroglyphics ⇑
Modern hieroglyphics ⇓
“’Punctuation is the only thing that separates us from the lower animals!’ he said, sarcasm phaser set on stun. ‘Good point,’ she replied. ‘My dog still can’t use a semi-colon.’” Tutoring the Tutor
(And a kitten dies every time someone uses “there” for “their.”)
Writers: Cherish this relationship! ⇓
“My spelling is Wobbly. It’s good spelling but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places.” ~A.A. Milne
“A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the other one.” ~Baltasar Gracián
“And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before–and thus was the Empire forged.” ~Douglas Adams
“The past is always tense, the future perfect.” ~Zadie Smith
…and some days I get a feeling that Grammar is someone’s old lady sitting in a rocking chair. I’m old enough to be some of the young whipper snappers’ Grammar 😀
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;>)
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Just got my WIP from my sister. Seems that I’m comma-etically and hypen-etically challenged. (I really just wanted to know where she got bored so I could think about editing things out. She wasn’t bored!)
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Good news, Joy! “Not bored” is way more important than “fix these commas and hyphens.”
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I’m so relieved!
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Hilarious!
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Thanks for the giggle…such good ones!
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Good ones, all!
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Excellent, Mitch.
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Clever stuff.
Art
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Good ones Mitch! I’m from the very old school when we actually studied grammar as a separate subject in high school. I had a friend, in her early 30s, who told me they never studied grammar at all through school. How can that be? How do you write anything that makes sense without knowing grammar?
A number of years ago a writiers’ group I was part of would take a day every year to do little seminars about different writing subjects. I did a quiz on grammar. I had found many “mistakes” in my general reading and had kept track of them, put them in the quiz along with correct sentences and let the group figure out which were correct and which were wrong. Of course, they had to come up with the proper corrections for those that were wrong. It was fun.
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I’m more gooder at reeding and ritting since i learnt to reed betterer
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Hilarious 😂
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A nice collection of writing humor. Thanks, Mitch.
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My pleasure, Manette.
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Just love this post!
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Over their, over their,
Send the word, send the word over their . . . 😉
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Over their what? ;>)
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Over their write word, of course.
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I am in the Grammar Police, and I have a badge to prove it. Think I’ll post it on the next Wordless Wednesday hosted by Comedy Plus. Your right to call attention we must be continually reminded of yore tales of you’re. Thanx for calling attention to this important work.
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Love these!
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Love this and am sharing it.
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Great post! Thanks for sharing.
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Darn! Baltasar Gracián knows my secret!
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;>)
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Thank-you for the humor and fun ^_^
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Oh my KKK you have a golden collection of some really good ones. KKK I must admit that kitten mortality really is on the rise
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“KKK”?
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I noticed that after lol
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