When Will This Damndemic End?

'Springtime for Hitler' from the musical 'The Producers'Springtime for Hitler from the Broadway musical The Producers

It was the first professional theatre production I ever saw. I was 13, and mad about acting. So Mom bought me season tickets for a new playhouse not far from Disneyland.

In order to generate maximum dollars, the Theatre-Which-Shall-Not-Be-Named (long-since closed down) cast faded movie stars in lead roles, and threw their shows together in minimal time.

It was the old chestnut Heaven Can Wait, starring and directed by Hollywood character actor Jack Palance, who was terribly miscast (and too old) for the leading role, and not a director. So it would have been bad theatre anyway. But the pièce de résistance came when two of the leads were replaced at the last minute by stand-ins who didn’t know their lines or blocking (where to go on-stage) or, apparently, what the show was about.

Even though they carried scripts, they would repeatedly get lost and audibly whisper, “What page are we on?” Finally, several of the more seasoned actors cursed loudly, threw up their hands in disgust, and walked off-stage.

The lights were brought up for a quick, unscheduled “intermission,” and then, unbelievably, the never-ending train-wreck of a show resumed! During which time, all but the most masochistic (or sadistic?) audience members went to the box office and demanded refunds.

That’s how I feel about COVID 19. Last year, we did our best to throw this show together, and it seemed we’d almost gotten there. But now? Some have failed to learn their lines or blocking, or even what the show is about.

So, let’s be patient, play our roles, when necessary help others learn to their lines, and bring this train-wreck to an end. Because there’s no one in the audience this time–we’re all in the play–and no one gets a refund.

When will this damndemic end? When we all decide to end it.


About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Humor, Memoir and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

30 Responses to When Will This Damndemic End?

  1. Julanne says:

    Spot on Mitch!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. ALL being the operative word.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. If our troops could successfully invade Normandy despite the seasoned, Nazi forces, we can win this world war. We CAN end this thing together.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. mic says:

    If treatment is done by the politicians is over in far away .

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Piano girl says:

    Yes! Never thought this is where we’d be as school gets ready to start again…

    Liked by 2 people

  6. atimetoshare.me says:

    The show must go on🥸

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Excellent comparison, as always, Mitch. Sounds like a movie title, 🎬“Damndemic!,” streaming to your living room soon. 🍿Right now it sure would help if we were more like ants and less like (insert solitary insect here ____.)

    Liked by 2 people

  8. A good word Mitch. When people in my sphere of influence begin to talk about this being about personal rights and freedom I am trying to learn to remind them that love and community trump personal rights and personal freedom.

    Liked by 4 people

  9. No. I’m not playing. pandemic larp. In fact, I didn’t buy tickets and you can’t force me to watch the show. This particular play won’t end until the audience gets up and walks out.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. trE says:

    This is golden. Thank you for sharing it, Mitch.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. yakpro2015 says:

    What does that mean, when we all decide to end it?

    Liked by 1 person

    • mitchteemley says:

      At this point, Joe, I’d say the main thing is to be vaccinated, since vaccination is not just about avoiding contracting the virus oneself, but avoiding being a carrier. One of my dearest friends died from COVID 19 in February, and it’s likely he contracted it from someone who didn’t know they were carrying it.


      • yakpro2015 says:

        You have to remember who the director is and the production staff of this one. I’ve had one close friend pass from Covid (who was 89 and in ill health) She caught it on a cruise she was warned to stay off. The vaccine is maybe as good as having anitbodies from the disease (which people seem to negate) I have many friends who had Covid (variety of ages) and came through without any issues. From what I’m reading, vaccinated people can carry Delta and other strains without knowing and pass it around to the unmasked…


      • mitchteemley says:

        Who are “the director and production staff” on this, Joe, and what does that have to do with whether or not to be vaccinated? I’m happy for your friend who was in poor health and chose to risk her life. My friend was not old or in poor health, and did not choose exposure to the virus. Neither did his own antibodies save him (vaccines help people develop resistance they haven’t developed on their own–that’s what they’re for). Another friend of mine, a vibrant, healthy middle-aged mother didn’t choose to die from COVID either, but she did. Yes, there are accounts of people with the vaccine carrying the virus, but they are a small number, statistically, and likely did so before they’d had both shots and finished the 2-week follow-up. Here’s an interesting series of pro-vaccination posts developed by evangelical Christian leaders for skeptical Christians. https://www.christiansandthevaccine.com/

        Liked by 2 people

  12. Catxman says:

    I’m surprised no one’s mentioning the economic benefits of a plague which mostly strikes down those who are 57 years of age and up and who have seen the best most productive years of their lives pass them by. Every old-age home resident who passes away saves the state tons of money. The powers that be, worshiping Mammon, must be gloating.

    — Catxman



  13. Carla says:

    I can’t agree more, We are all in this, so let’s get out of it together.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Pingback: When Will This Damndemic End? – Uncoffined

  15. Unicorn Dreaming says:

    Well said ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Had I been in the audience of the theatrical fiasco, I would have welcomed the resumption of a show so hilariously bad that it was good, tho not in any way that was planned.

    As U so aptly stated, we are all actors in the COVID 19 fiasco.  But this time the show is not funny.  The bungling actors and those who coddle them may snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Jeff says:

    Well said sir. I lost my Dad last October to COVID-19. He never left the house until he was sick. Probably got it from a family member who didn’t think it was serious or real (we still have several who think this way unfortunately). He would have taken the vaccine because he loved life and the people in it. He didn’t get that chance. Thank you for this post.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Jack says:

    Good words, Mitch. We all have to work together as a team if we want to solve problems.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I like your word for it. “Damndemic” Perfect. You are spot on about it. It’s time to be done with it.

    Liked by 1 person

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