Lockdown, Part Two?

My state, like most of the world, is on the verge of producing a bad sequel, Lockdown, Part Two: Just When You Thought It Was Safe to Go Into a Restaurant. For many, the last lockdown seemed to last forever and got terrible reviews at Rotten Tomatoes.

But (mixing metaphors) Dad (our governor) says we’ve been bad! We’ve been caught behaving indecently—letting our masks down in public and exposing ourselves to others! (COVID-19 infections are spiraling out of control). So Dad has given us one week to “shape up, mister and/or missy!” And if we don’t, he says he’ll put us all on restriction (again) and send us to our rooms without supper (close bars and restaurants) before we do something we’ll regret—like catch a social disease! “And no more of that risqué behavior in public (being closer than six feet apart), or it’ll be no parties for you–ever!”

Oddly enough, Dad isn’t cutting our screen time. In fact, he’s pretty much sentencing us to it. I mean, what else is there to do when you can’t hang out at your friend’s house and play beer pong with your mask down?

Thing is, when you’re alone a lot, like a-lot-a-lot, you get kinda squirrely. Here’s a note I wrote to myself last spring:

Dear Self: Are you reading this? No! You never do! Why do I even bother? You’re so self-absorbed! You don’t even care about me! I don’t want to hang out with you anymore! – One week later – Note to Self: Stop writing notes to Self! He just doesn’t get you!

See what I mean? Ah, well, we do what we have to to cope, right? For example…

Write silly blog posts like this one.

All joking aside, I fully support our governor’s actions. COVID-19 is no laughing matter, and joking about it is simply my coping mechanism. But better that than writing crazy notes to self. Right? Hello? Are you even listening to me?

About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Humor, Popular Culture & Entertainment and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

42 Responses to Lockdown, Part Two?

  1. …Silly blogs, huh?
    Maybe I’ll post a piece I wrote once at a speaking seminar about ADD, where I just wrote down everything that popped into my mind. As I delivered that speech, one of the instructors just sat there laughing, while the other looked pensive and took notes like a psychiatrist analyzing a patient.

    Liked by 7 people

  2. Zoewiezoe says:

    That second gif just makesme want to have a got twerking (can you tell we’re already a month into lockdown 2.0 🤭🤪)?

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Yes, our governor here also sent us back to our rooms. But you’re a genius – two weeks of silly posts ought to do it.

    First thought, I have to sneak out to the grocery store for popcorn and cheese snacks …

    Liked by 6 people

  4. I’m thinking about moving somewhere very far away.

    Antarctica doesn’t have the covid, right?

    Liked by 8 people

  5. Gail Perry says:

    Silly posts ought to be as required as masks. They should be a necessary (but not sufficient) addition to Lockdowns. If every blogger posted one silly thing every day, we’d all want to stay inside to read them! Thankfully, we’re not there yet but we are experiencing anti-mask rallies, so I guess it’ll happen soon enough. Being silly really helps, so keep it up! ❤🙏🇨🇦

    Liked by 5 people

  6. joyroses13 says:

    Crazy times we are in for sure! Writing silly stories and reading blogs definitely helps maintain some sanity! 🙂 Keep writing.

    Liked by 5 people

  7. Relax... says:

    It’s sad to think of how much Monty Python must be eating its heart out right now, lol. (And, our Northeast *Dad* is a solid R, so he’s been leaving most of the restrictions to Mom [cities/schools/airlines/borders] so far.)

    Liked by 5 people

  8. I’m sorry. Did you say something? 😉

    Liked by 4 people

  9. Kellie says:

    This is a great coping mechanism, it made me smile and smiles are quite useful. Good luck shutting down COVID 🤞🍀

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Governor-Dad in my state put a new curfew on the restaurants and bars in my state. Apparently, the residents-adolescents are doing too much breathing in each other’s faces after 9 PM.

    Liked by 4 people

  11. This blog actually runs a healthy levity path right through the middle of the intensity, turns and faces it strongly with direct honesty. Best way to make besties with a Beasty? To face it. Excellent post with humor to assure perspective to stay alive well.

    Liked by 4 people

  12. Christi says:

    We’re getting more restrictions here too, though not as many as before because people “don’t like them.” In other words, public opinion outweighs civic duty. *sigh*

    Liked by 3 people

  13. carolannec says:

    Lol, well said.
    And from the UK, given any action take two weeks to have an impact on number of cases… welcome to the dark side of solo-cocktail parties, video-chat seances and compulsive meme collecting… I have many, many memes to share if you need some. 😝

    Liked by 3 people

  14. We’re headed toward a lockdown as well if people don’t smarten up.

    Liked by 3 people

  15. M.B. Henry says:

    LOL this made me laugh. The humor is “infectious”…. but seriously, be safe.

    Liked by 3 people

  16. Clever Girl says:

    I innocently thought this was going to be over by the end of the year. Boy was I naive! Oh well… how about that guy on the roller skates? What a badass!

    Liked by 3 people

  17. BGCT2VA says:

    Well, For some strange reason I have a hard time believing anything that any government “official” says. Another Lock-down? Things are going to be very interesting.

    Liked by 3 people

  18. uncoffined says:

    They have been threatening to do another lockdown in NZ, with the same patronising attitude as mentioned in the post.
    I’m all set up for this one, with projects to do around the house.

    Liked by 3 people

  19. Unicorn Dreaming says:

    I know lockdown is painful and boring but we did it here in Australia and we have virtually eradicated Covid.. tough times I know but hang in their and it will soon be over.. much love to you.. 😊💛😊

    Liked by 3 people

  20. JOY journal says:

    Stay well and wry, Mitch!

    Liked by 3 people

  21. Pingback: Lockdown, Part Two? – Blue flaim

  22. henhouselady says:

    I hate the thought of another lock down. Don’t want to see the sequel, no, no, no.

    l

    Liked by 2 people

  23. gpavants says:

    Mitch,

    We hear you in the “left” coast( though I an Right, right?) about not liking lockdown. Just a little wisdom and a lot of humor!

    In Christ, Gary

    Liked by 1 person

  24. They are being slow about it but I predict a lockdown before Christmas. Maybe we can just get snowed in. might as well. Good thing blogging has been keeping me busy.

    ~ Brittany
    http://www.mindbeautysimplicity.wordpress.com

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Purva says:

    Beautifully written 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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