Random Complaints

Dentists: I’ve had temporary crowns put on my broken tooth three times this week; I was told to chew more carefully (the last one fell off while I was eating soup). They told me it would take two weeks for my permanent crown to be ready. I said, “Dude, I’ve been waiting for that crown all my life.” Dental groaner: Q: What’s the best time to go to the dentist? A. 2:30 (think about it).

Aging: I received this message from classmates.com: “Someone remembered you as attractive.” I clicked on the link and read, “Upgrade to find out who!” and I thought, “Wait, I have to pay to find out what old person thinks I’m hot?”

Laundry: It’s touching when an old couple dies within days of one another. Not so much when they’re your washer and dryer.

Auditions (I’m an actor): Casting Director (after audition): “I’m sorry, we’re looking for a different quality.” Actor: “What quality?” Casting Director: “Talent.”

Friends in Swimsuits: It’s embarrassing when my friends post pictures of themselves in bikinis online. And some of them are even women.

About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Culture, Humor, Quips and Quotes and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

20 Responses to Random Complaints

  1. Eliza Ayres says:

    Reblogged this on Blue Dragon Journal and commented:

    Liked by 2 people

  2. atimetoshare.me says:

    You are a funny man.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Thank you for the laugh! I needed it!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. revruss1220 says:

    I get it! “Tooth-hurty”!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Erika Kind says:

    This is hilarious again 😅

    Liked by 2 people

  6. hcmorris77 says:

    thanks! I needed that!!

    Liked by 2 people

  7. This is too funny, Mitch!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. M.B. Henry says:

    LOL! That audition one really got a giggle from me. As did everything about dentists and dental work!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. The dental jokes would be funny if they weren’t true. 2:30 was cute, though.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. lprslr says:

    Oh the joys of getting old(er)… feeling your pain while laughing hysterically!

    Liked by 2 people

  11. I had three temp crowns break on me this month too! One while I was brushing my teeth …

    how do I chew on the other side while brushing my teeth?

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Funny! I remember my brother telling me he must have swallowed a temporary crown so at least that didn’t happen!

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Christi says:

    Oh man, that audition swipe didn’t really happen, didn’t it? OUCH!

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Getting the 2:30 pun took me a while.

    I have enough crowns to make the mineral rights to my mouth valuable, and I have had “permanent” crowns pop off and/or wear out (with actual holes in the metal).  But I’ve never had a problem with a temporary crown!  Maybe your dentist should consult mine.

    Liked by 1 person

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