Deep Thoughts (While Avoiding Weekend Chores)

Useful New Terms:

the_shelf_sweepAmbibiguity: The ability to make indecipherable gestures with either or both hands.

Pontypical: Something the Pope says on a regular basis.

Carcasm: Snide remarks my car makes behind my back.

Cpresentation1atskills*: Chasing invisible intruders; fitting on windowsills that are one fourth as wide as they are; making their legs disappear beneath them so they look like furry little gondolas; standing on top of you and pawing your face when you oversleep (past 5 a.m.), until you finally get up and feed them.

*Not to be confused with the mountain resort of the same name in upstate New York where comedians go to die.

Inflation in the 1970s:

“A penny nickel quarter dollar for your thoughts.”

Something I’d like to Read:

Field and Stream-of-Consciousness Magazine, for existentialist outdoors types

Profound question of the day:

th5ytzfqgtDid you ever kill all the ants in your kitchen, except one, so that it could go back and warn the others to stay away, making you feel like the villain in a bad western?

OK, Back to Work:

tenor

About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Humor, Mitchellaneous, Quips and Quotes and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to Deep Thoughts (While Avoiding Weekend Chores)

  1. We need a new dictionary

    Liked by 1 person

  2. simplywendi says:

    🙂 hope you were able to get your chores done!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ROFLOL!!! 😂😅🤣

    Liked by 1 person

  4. LOL looks like we got us a Soul Train 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Thanks for some Saturday good cheer.😁

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Catskills – how funny. 😸

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I always leave a messenger ant to carry the tale of massive carnage home. Mwa ha ha ha!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Thanks for the giggle!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thanks for some good laughs!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. lynnabbott says:

    You are hilarious! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Really, I have never been to the Catskills however I have observed all that you described. The hands’ thing is called “Mano-versation”. and I do not think my thought have that much value, even with inflation. Ants communicate using Mano-versation. I think?

    Liked by 1 person

  12. SarahC says:

    Lol get to work! (Wink)

    Like

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