Saturday chores: This is just so wrong. My wife expects me to vacuum before there’s any actual proof of need! When I do something I want to know I’ve made the world a better place, rescued it from imminent destruction. I want to part the dirt like Moses (well, OK, God) parted the Red Sea! “Give me something I can see!” I shout. “But this business of vacuuming by faith–well, darn it, it’s simply got to stop, woman!”
Of course, I never actually say this aloud. I’m lazy, not stupid.