Summer Blockbusters We’ll Never See

Guardians-of-the-Galaxy-Vol-2-wallpaper

We’re only half way through spring (in my hemisphere), but as far as Hollywood is concerned summer begins in May! And of course, you know what that means: Complex, original, profound works of cinematic art, right? Duh. No! It means summer blockbusters! Which translates to tired sequels and cheesy knock-offs. Although a few (can you say Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2?) may actually turn out to be good.

Meanwhile, here are a few I’d like to see:

Summer Movies3

Summer Movies1

Summer Movies4

Summer Movies5

And here’s one I’d like to make! I filmed this trailer with some friends a few years back–and would love to make the movie!

Wanna help finance it? Call me. We’ll do lunch!

About mitchteemley

Writer, Filmmaker, Humorist, Thinker-about-stuffer
This entry was posted in Humor, Movies, Popular Culture & Entertainment, Videos and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to Summer Blockbusters We’ll Never See

  1. LMAO – tooo funny!!!! Love the “clip” – hahahaha

    Liked by 1 person

  2. atimetoshare.me says:

    Over and over again and again 😀 wish I could help, but I’m working on my own screenplay called .”HAMOLOT’ about a legendary king from Denmark who has a severe disorder. He eats himself to death along with a cast of thousands that do the same thing over and over again. Of course they all die.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Notzilla – so I’m in and will help finance. I got a dollar, what do you have?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Stephen Eyre says:

    Just saw Guardians 2 last night. Awful movie!

    Two things:

    1.) bad writing and poor plot development—a jumble of loosely connected Hollywood special effect pyrotechnics 2.) Most blasphemous bald-face rip off of the gospel I have ever been exposed to.

    Other than that, it was really good.

    Stephen

    >

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Please ask for a sequel for Napolean Dynamite!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. HILARIOUS! Thank you for the laugh! Die Hard 22…awwww, Bruce! “Down!” Bah ha ha ha! 😀

    Liked by 2 people

  7. nancyehead says:

    Your talents are indeed multidimensional. God bless!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Squid says:

    Mr. Mitch, you’ve outdone yourself!! Hahaha oh my goodness, I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time… Thank you!!
    Squid

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Good ones, Mitch.

    “Coming July 2022” — that’s funny!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Mel-ania says:

    Funny, funny, funny. LOL non-stop. And your graphic design skills are superb. How about we swap some dosh for some design help?

    Liked by 1 person

  11. BelleUnruh says:

    Loved everything in this post. So did my husband.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Jennie says:

    Hysterical. Belly laughed over Hungry Hungry Hippos.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. LOL, loved the trailer, Mitch! I can see a pitch from someone you don’t even know right now, trying to convince you that he had connections to someone who could get this movie made. It might go something like this—although I hope not. “Mitchy, Mitchy baby, I think this Notzilla thing has money written all over it. It might even have legs… perhaps a set of teeth and some claws too. I mean, we’re talking big money here boobala… at least a couple hundred bucks! Why with the right director (Fred Smith, remember him? That’s okay, nobody else does either), I bet it could save the Die Hard franchise. Alright, maybe nothing could save the Die Hard franchise (let’s not go overboard, right?), but it might save a few extras some residual paychecks anyway. Hey way a minute, I got it! I do know a guy, a guy who happens to know a guy, who once knew a woman that was once a guy… but that guy can’t help us anyway. But, then there is this other person I know (who isn’t a guy at all, OR A WOMAN for that matter), but he does know a studio exec. Now THIS GUY, this guy he has got his fingers into everything, and he even knows a whole bunch of people—unfortunately, none of them have any money. Although, there is just a chance one of them might know someone who does. And that someone who does just might have some spare change lying around who could possibly back this whole Notzilla thing. Well, whaddya say, huh, is it a deal?” 😀

    Liked by 1 person

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