Part Two: Oil and Water
(To read Part One, click here)
Now, about that woman I was “destined to marry”…
I was leading the performing artists group at a large church in Southern California. There was a creative intellectual in the group who was very attractive and ridiculously easy to talk to. We blended effortlessly, and I’d been thinking she might just be my soulmate.
Then one night a beautiful young woman showed up. After the meeting, a gaggle of us went out to celebrate a birthday. I hitched a ride with the pretty newbie, Trudy. At the restaurant, I kept looking back and forth between her and my would-be soulmate. “No!” I resolved, “Don’t go there. Stick with your soulmate!” Trudy drove me home afterward. I leaned in to hug her goodnight. Mistaking the direction of my head, she turn her face toward mine.
And our lips met in the middle.
I’ve written elsewhere about our love and our differences. Let me just repeat that we were wildly different from one another, this pretty newbie and I. We were oil and water. We dated off-and-on for two years. Each time we broke up, I’d attempt to ignite a flame with someone who was more like me, more, you know, soulmateish. But then, somehow, Trudy and I would end up back in our oil and water relationship.
Powerful symbols, water and oil. Water is the biblical symbol of life, of God’s provision. Oil is the symbol of calling and purpose (which is why it’s used for spiritual anointing). Two things we can’t live without: Life and Purpose. Can they be mixed? Yes. But only with constant stirring. Which is why I began Part One by saying that all blessings are mixed. Mixed blessings are God’s specialty.
Trudy and I met on January 13th, 34 years ago, and marriage to her has been the greatest blessing of my life. But make no mistake—it has also been a mixed blessing. My would-be-could-be-soulmates were nothing like her. They were easy to mix with because they were either very much like me, or (I’m embarrassed to admit this) very impressed with me.
Trudy is neither. She challenges me. Constantly. Makes me grow. Constantly. Makes me better.
And I do the same for her.
Mixed? Oh, yes. As in “in need of constant stirring.” The blending together of Life and Purpose.
So, this is my belated but whole-hearted thank you to God for being a God of Mixed Blessings.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
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Sounds a LOT like my ‘almost 43 year’ marriage to Gary as well… oil and water… never boring, constantly stirring, and something I wouldn’t change for anything! God is good!
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Yep!
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Well Mitch, now I know where I went wrong in many of my relationships. They were more like oil and vinegar with me usually being the vinegar. Great for salad dressing but difficult in love. Congrats to you and yours
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Thank you, Larry. Praying for a (to reverse Bond) “stirred, not shaken” future for you.
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I love this blog! My husband could have written it. Lol
Keep stirring.
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;>)
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Beautiful piece, Mitch! Hurray for those who persist and find the beauty of long-term intimacy. It’s never easy but the journey is worth it.
I also met my wife in a theater group! We were 19 at the time and are enjoying life still some 46 years later.
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How cool is that, Rich?
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I’m in my 53 year of stirring. Can’t do it without divine intervention.
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Oh, yeah.
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Mitch, Knowing you before and after, I have to admit, Trudy has had the most positive impact on you. Someone like you would have only reinforced who you were at the time. I love seeing the growth and insight you continually share. Be blessed, even if it is “mixed”. Although I think my mix is more “shaken, not stirred.!”always, and please give my best to your lovely wife. Joe
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SDG Soli Deo Gloria “To God Alone the Glory”
From: Mitch Teemley To: yak_pro@yahoo.com Sent: Friday, January 13, 2017 7:09 AM Subject: [New post] Mixed Blessings #yiv3663773488 a:hover {color:red;}#yiv3663773488 a {text-decoration:none;color:#0088cc;}#yiv3663773488 a.yiv3663773488primaryactionlink:link, #yiv3663773488 a.yiv3663773488primaryactionlink:visited {background-color:#2585B2;color:#fff;}#yiv3663773488 a.yiv3663773488primaryactionlink:hover, #yiv3663773488 a.yiv3663773488primaryactionlink:active {background-color:#11729E;color:#fff;}#yiv3663773488 WordPress.com | mitchteemley posted: “Part Two: Oil and WaterNow, about that woman I was “destined to marry”…I was leading the performing artists group at a large church in Southern California. There was a creative intellectual in the group who was very attractive and ridiculously easy to” | |
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There was something wrong with “who I was at the time”? ;>) (You’re right.) So, Samii “shakes” you, eh?
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ANNIVERSARY BLESSINGS TO YOU! Here’s to many years of being stirred but never shaken…
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;>)
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Mitch, great story. Mine is also like oil and water. My husband is grateful for that. After all, marry someone you see in the mirror may not be a good idea after all. Congrats for your anniversary.
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Thank you, Miriam!
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You’re welcome, Mitch!
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Great things happen on January 13. God bless!
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I love this, Mitch! Thank you for sharing it with us all!
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Mitch, you and the wife have great chemistry. 😀
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Sharing of one’s life is easy to read and difficult to express. Some of us can and some of us can’t. You are the easy and the can of your posts. Great stories you share to keep us up to the task. Congrats and Blessings are stirred into your future.
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Thank you, JW. Blessings to you, as well.
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Today, the second read was as good as the other day. You are truly blessed with all that gives life meaning.
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Reblogged this on Mitch Teemley and commented:
36 years ago I met someone who was, well, not the girl of my dreams (that would be someone who thought I was perfect), but who would challenge nearly everything I did. And the rest is history–or should I say herstory?
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After 34 years I’d probably stick with her too. I mean, you’ve spent the better part of your life training her (and her you). It would be a shame to not honor that effort. My wife and I celebrated 60 years of marriage. She’s in a nursing home now, unable to walk, stand, feed herself or hardly talks. But I go there every evening for two hours in order to make sure she’s taken care of and I feed her supper. The love we shared forces me to continue to protect her and do everything I can to make her as happy as I can. Sometimes I make faces in order to make her laugh, and my baby is back again, if only for a moment. Cherish the time you have together and take care of one another. You really have become one..
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Oh, Art, thank you. What a sweet, difficult, wonderful story you share with your wife. You really have become one, as well, and one day in the not too distant future that oneness will become something even more perfect in Christ’s presence.
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I too have a wife that challenges me and just will not always agree with me. But, wow she makes me better, pushes me. I push her and we wouldn’t have it any other way. Maybe God knows what he is doing when he puts us all together after all.
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Maybe. ;>)
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My thoughts went in the same direction as Larry Paul Brown’s (above): salad dressing. Give me a good olive oil and a good red wine vinegar for my salad–lots of healthy zing. I’d put you and Trudy in that category!
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;>) Thanks, Nancy!
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I love this so much! It definitely caught my interest.
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Oh this is so so good and yup there is something to be said for the “oil and water” love!! Happy Anniversary and may you have many more!
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Thank you, Joy!
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Sometimes it’s all in God’s perfect timing. I’ve tried to make things happen but it doesn’t work out. But when I let God do it, it happened!
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